From the moment of our birth upon this earth, the quest for acceptance, true unconditional love was already beating in our very being. We came from a place of unconditional love, as we were created and formed by our Father’s loving hands. “You formed my innermost being, shaping my delicate inside and my intricate outside,
and wove them all together in my mother’s womb.” Psalm 139:13.But how could we be searching for something that we never knew existed?

My belief is that we knew the pure love of our Heavenly Father in the realm of eternity. Then when we were born flesh and blood, we instinctively knew we were missing something that made us whole. We quickly learned though how to make our parents jump and give us what we wanted.

As we grew into a toddler, the closest thing to fulfilling the empty place in our hearts was our family. Some of us were blessed to live in a family that affirmed us, many did not. Still, even the best of families could not fill that which we sought.

We then became of age to leave our secure home, our dependence on our parents and off to school we went. We believed everyone would love and dote on us as our parents. We believed everyone was just like us. We had not been harshly judged, told we looked funny, or didn’t wear the latest fashion. For the most part, we had been happy.

Once again, we looked to be accepted. The games we played with our parents to get what we wanted didn’t work with our teachers. We were just one of many who were a little “princess” or “prince”. We began playing sports or joined clubs – or wished that we did, but maybe we didn’t have the money or talent to be included. We wanted to belong to something so much and be like everyone else, so we would fit in and be affirmed. By this time, we were willing to try anything to be loved and accepted. Some of us studied hard to make perfect grades. Others joined every extracurricular activity they could to be “in the crowd”. Though some of our attempts we stumbled on to some things we were good at. Little did we realize that these were a gift that our Heavenly Father deposited into us for His glory.

All the while, our Father was watching over us…seeing the wrong choices we made, seeing the hurt and rejection we endured. He saw some of us ended up hiding from others, even ourselves. Still, in His love, He was always lovingly reaching out to us…longing for us to turn to Him.

We went on to search for the exact career that would fill that still aching need to be loved as we had experienced by our Heavenly Father. We thought being fulfilled was being successful – making it in the world so we would have the acceptance of our peers and our neighbors. We met Mr. or Miss Perfect, got married and had children. All this is wonderful but still….the longing remained.

Somewhere along the way, we finally heard the call of our Father. We accepted Jesus as our Savior. His Presence enveloped us and the pure love. That which we have been seeking our whole life was now not only revealed. Unfortunately, many of us learned more laws than unconditional love. We then began again looking for acceptance from our Pastors and those we deemed “spiritual”. We volunteered for everything there was to do. We worked in the nursery, parked cars, cleaned and did lawn work. We fed the poor, joined the choir and went to nursing homes. Still…we knew there was more. We accepted Him as Savior, but had yet to allow Him to be Lord. Still, all of this is just the Outer Court.